Where Do Angels Lose Their Way?
by ShadowGlass
Summary: Since the death of her best friend, Krista Strife hasn't been the same... Please R


Where Do Angels Lose Their Way?  
  
Fanfic by ShadowGlass  
  
(A/N: I don't own Final Fantasy VII or any of the songs/poems mentioned in this story. Their respective owners are listed. And the above saying is from Chrono Cross. Yeah. ^_^ Also, this fic contains *some* content that may be slightly offensive to some readers. It's not that bad, but it's there. Some drug usage, references to some things. And of course drinking and swearing, that's ALWAYS expected. If you have something against this stuff, go read another fic.)  
  
Losing Grip  
  
Are you aware of what you make me feel, baby Right now I feel invisible to you, like I'm not real Didn't you feel me lock my arms around you Why'd you turn away Here's what I have to say  
  
I was left to cry there Waiting outside there Grinning with a lost stare That's when I decided.  
  
Why should I care Cause you weren't there when I was scared I was so alone. You need to listen I'm startin to trip, I'm losing my grip And I'm in this thing alone  
  
Am I just some chick you placed beside you To take somebody's place When you turn around can you recognize my face You used to love me, you used to hug me But that wasn't the case Everything wasn't ok.  
  
© Avril Lavigne "Let Go"  
  
The smoke floated up above her head as she expelled it out her mouth, the bittersweet taste flooding past her lips. Nowadays, cigarettes had become one of her favorite pastimes. A way to have an addiction without killing herself right away like the steadily-increasing-in-popularity drug heroin. Ever since people found out they could get their hands on the stuff, drug dealers started roaming the streets in some of the larger cities. As bad as she was, she couldn't bring herself to try the junk.  
  
Krista Strife was nineteen years old, about to be twenty in a month. Following her last breakup she'd moved In with her brother Cloud. Despite the fact that the two were siblings, they hadn't seen each other in almost fourteen years. But when he met up with her in a bar in the sleazier part of Junon, he took her in. It was a year after the Meteor crisis and, without a government; the world was going to hell. In the big cities, drug dealers, prostitutes, and the occasional bounty hunter ran wild. The smaller towns had the thieves and a few murderers. Shinra, while it had been corrupt itself, had at least been good at keeping the people in check. Now, no one had any rules to abide by anymore and things were going badly. The current worst place to be was Junon, where bars and cabarets were springing up all over the place. The ruins of Midgar were also considered one of the most dangerous places, half-destroyed mako reactors becoming bases for gangs of murderers and thieves. What was left of the Shinra building became the hideout for the most notorious gang of bounty hunters around. They had once tried to take over Kalm, but backed out when they saw the new residents, Cloud Strife and Tifa Lockheart. Cloud and Tifa moved into a house together and were now married. They resided in Kalm, the second-safest town in the world next to Cosmo Canyon. Cloud became a weapons seller and Tifa took over Kalm's only restaurant. In the beginning, she'd tried to get Krista to work there, but the girl had vehemently refused, stating that the last thing she wanted to be was tied down by some waitress job. Now she spent her time smoking on the porch, listening to loud music, or plotting ways to get back to Junon. That was where it was at, not some quiet little town in the countryside.  
  
She took another drag off the cigarette. Suddenly she felt it plucked out from between her fingers. Cloud dropped it on the porch and crushed it angrily with his boot. "Hey! Those are expensive!" she protested, whirling around to face her older brother. He snorted.  
  
"Yeah, really? How many things did you have to steal? How many men did you have to screw to get this?" he demanded. She stared at him, openmouthed and appalled. "Don't give me that look. I know you go out every night. I'm not sure to where, but I've told you numerous times that it's not safe to-"  
  
"Look, I don't want to hear it." Krista crossed her arms and glared at her brother. "You're my sibling, not my goddamned keeper. Why don't you just get the hell out of my business, okay?"  
  
"I would, if I knew I could trust you!" Cloud proclaimed. "But I never know where you are or what you're doing! I'm worried about you and what could happen!"  
  
She turned away from him. "Yeah, I'm touched."  
  
Cloud grabbed her shoulder and forced her back around. "Don't turn your back on me. I'm trying to help you, damn it, now listen to me."  
  
"What's there to listen to? All you are is my annoying older brother telling me how to live my life. I don't need to hear that." She shook him off and stalked down the porch steps. "One of these days, I'm going back to Junon. That's where life really begins." With that she took off running towards the entrance to the town, no doubt going to leave. Cloud sighed and dropped down onto one of the porch steps. Tifa came out the door, looking flustered.  
  
"She's gone, isn't she." It wasn't a question. Tifa knew the answer. Cloud nodded miserably anyway. She sat down next to him and put her hand on his arm. Krista will be fine. Nothing's going to happen to her."  
  
"But with all the stuff going on now.I'm afraid she'll get caught up in it. I know she smokes and most likely drinks.but."  
  
Tifa shook her head. "There's no way she'd get into all that drug crap. All the heroin dealers were scared out of Kalm. Besides.remember what happened to Ashanta?" She spoke the name of Krista's best friend who had overdosed on the drug and killed herself. Krista had been completely devastated and took up smoking and sneaking out around that time. "She'd never get into that junk after what it did to Ashanta."  
  
Cloud nodded. "I'm still worried though. I mean she's my little sister. I don't know why she wasn't at home when I went to Nibelheim on the SOLDIER assignment. I didn't want to ask my mother. What if something horrible had happened and I ended up bringing back memories? No, I couldn't do that. But when I saw her.I just knew she was my sister. I have to say, I was scared of how she looked. She was drunk, sick, and angry at life. It wasn't easy to get her to come back with me, but I'm glad I did. Even with all she puts me through."  
  
"You're doing a good thing, being so nice to her. She doesn't really always deserve it, but you help her out anyway." She wrapped one arm around Cloud's shoulders. "She'll be okay. I know that she'll be okay."  
  
  
  
It was almost midnight by the time Krista reached Junon. It had taken a long time, even on the back of her brother's beloved Gold Chocobo Pyro. She stumbled into a bar, the first one she found. It smelt heavily of smoke and beer. Then she took a seat on a barstool next to a man with red hair and shades. "Don't act like you don't know I'm here, Reno," she said to him. He looked up and took off the sunglasses.  
  
"Krista? Whoa, hey sweetheart, what's new? Didn't think I'd ever see you 'round here. Not after that brother of yours abducted you. How've ya been?" His aqua-colored eyes sparkled at her and she gazed back into them with her own icy blue ones. She'd earned the family trademarks: fiery blue eyes and wildly blonde hair. Hers was long and wavy, going all the way down to her lower back. She wore a long black coat and a short light blue summer dress underneath it. Riding a chocobo usually got extremely cold and she'd wanted to be prepared.  
  
"I've been okay. Cloud still won't leave me alone. He keeps going on about how he doesn't want me to return to Junon and all that. But if I didn't come, how would I see you?" She smiled and sipped some foam from the brim of his beer glass.  
  
"Hey, did I say you could have some of that?" he asked, grinning. She shook her head and sipped some more until he snatched it away. Then he drank some and lowered his eyes. "Um, Krista."  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"Ah.it's nothing. Really. Just thought I remembered something, but I just forgot it." He looked up. "I hate when that happens. You wanna go back to my place? It's probably more entertaining than this bar, if you know what I mean."  
  
She nodded and stood up. Reno paid for his beer and the two walked out the door. The night had turned cold and she wrapped her jacket more tightly around herself and walked closer to Reno for more warmth. He put his arm around her waist and held her close. They reached his apartment on the other side of Junon and almost as soon as they got inside, Reno was laughing, she was giggling, and he was easing her back to his room.  
  
An hour later, he was asleep beside her, breathing deeply. Krista lay awake, wondering why she did this. She didn't really love Reno, not really. And she was pretty sure he didn't love her. So why did she do this?! To feel more special? To further push Cloud's hold on her away? Making love to Reno was just like making love to any other guy. So why him? Was she attracted by his badass Turk looks or his charm? Or perhaps he was just the best candidate. She didn't know. All she knew was that she couldn't bring herself to go to sleep, sleep in her lover's house and not feel the least bit guilty. It was a horrible, gnawing feeling that she hated. Guilt was this huge weight that pulled on your head and gave you a massive pain that was much deeper than any wound.  
  
Krista watched the moonlight dance across Reno's features. He was handsome, she would give him that. Perhaps that was why she could give herself up to him so easily. Or maybe it was a power thing. She knew Cloud couldn't stand Reno. Was she trying to get back at her brother by doing this?  
  
These questions were giving her a headache. She decided she could block out the guilt and sleep for a little while. Then, resting her weary head on Reno's chest, she fell into a deep slumber.  
  
END OF CHAPTER ONE!!  
  
So what did you think? Does it sound legitimate? Or should I stop writing right now? ^_^ Please review, mmkay?  
  
ShadowGlass81921@yahoo.com 


End file.
